I felt so cheated

Just let me rant about something...........

I saw a girl who looks like your ex-gf but it had been quite sometimes since I last saw her & I thought I could have seen the wrong person. In my mind I was thinking & telling myself that if she was really there, you could have be there & you might be the one who came with her. Well, a girl's 6th sense is pretty accurate. So it was her. Your ex-gf. I confirmed.

I felt rather uneasy seeing her just now & I realised that she was noticing me too. The look she gave me didn't seem to be very friendly. Maybe I was just getting a bit over sensitive but her presence made me feel edgy somehow. Then I spotted you standing beside her & talking to her. All of the sudden I felt so cheated. I assumed that the 2 of you might have already patched things up. At that very moment I was very regretful to have come & all I wanted to do was to faster find a place to hide or to faster finish my things & go off. I pretended to be very concentrated in doing my stuffs & I had my eyes shifted off the 2 of you to elsewhere. A while later, you came over & smiled to me but you said nothing & you walked away. The smile was so different from the smile you used to give me. It seemed so strange. It seemed so unfamiliar. It's the kind of the smile that you'll only give me wheneve she is there with you.

I don't know what have happened between the 2 of you & what's going on. I'm not very interested to know anyway. I just don't feel good seeing the 2 of you together. It's not that I like you but the actions, the behaviours & the things you do simply changed so fast. Guys. What's the meaning of "I'm willing to walk through the journey with you if you are willing to let me to & I guess in life what's most important is to find someone who really likes you." that you had told me earlier on? I really doubt everything that is going on & I really doubt the liking you said you had for me.

People who are reading this entry may think that I may have fallen for this guy & I'm just jealous of him & his girl. Well, I guess I'm not. I just feel so cheated by you & I just don't feel good seeing the 2 of you together. I must be crazy. If I don't like you, why should I be bother? Perhaps it's the emotional stress that I'm facing lately. Contradiction. Grrrrrr.......

I'll be fine after a sleep. Will I?